I recently visited the Bahamas to assist Harvard Professor Doris Sommer in her week-long workshop, Pre-Texts. It is a unique project that teaches literacy and citizenship through the arts.
COMMANDER IN CHIEF 2016: DONALD TRUMP
Miami Beige – island of abandoned luxury (formerly Miami Beach)
“You’ll swear you were really there!”
A proposal by Jay Critchley
Residences start at $22.5M!
Move it on up - to aspirational high ground! Realize true luxury. Experience this sand-encrusted, entombed, island of sumptuousness, a post-petroleum haven: Miami Beige – island of abandoned luxury.
Enjoy innovative, border-secure, sustainable island living with all the comforts you deserve. Its Coastal Living resort architecture features an eco-friendly beach-sand patina, a nostalgic reminder of yesteryear’s Sunshine State.
Indulge in opulent high life on this last, rarified, car-free outpost in South Florida with ocean views from every lookout. Amenities include solar powered incinerator toilets, potable drinking water, yoga and rumba classes and 24/7 heliport services to other “carried interest” island retreats. And, indoor beaches, free of jellyfish and sharks!
Miami Beige facilities, developed by Mobil Warming for a small planet in partnership with Disney World, include:
- Carbon Kindness Golf Club
- Chapel of Our Lady of the River of Grass
- Meltdown Mall
- Road Rage Rehab Center
- Climate Change Casino & Spa
- Faith-based Corporate Inversion Headquarters
- Manatee Fitness Center
- Governor’s Mobil Yawning Museum
- Bank & Trust the Magic
- Museum of Modern Archeology
And solar powered sump pumps in every residence.
It’s a small world after all.
Jay Critchley, Incorporated
Florida Atlantic University
Feb 5 - April 2, 2016
Opening Feb 4, 6:30pm Reading Feb 5, 7:00pm
read Press Release
Gallery Lecture at Florida International University
Miami Beach Urban Studios, College of Architecture + the Arts
Feb 19, 7:00pm
INSPICIO MAGAZINE, interview with artist by Susan Rand Brown
ART IN AMERICA, advert
image: Jay Critchley, Incorporated installation view from the Provincetown Art Association & Museum, 2015
33rd Re-Rooters Day Ceremony – 1-7-2016 – Provincetown Harbor
Mobil Warming – liboM gnimraW
The Lord appeared to Moses in the form of a burning bush and gave him…
The Ten Commandments of Corporate Gene-edited Shootings
1. Marketing of maladies is the Lord Thy God and thou shalt not have on fleek robotic heat seeking sensors fuel loading pre-human inversions;
CHANT AFTER EACH: liboM gnimraW
2. Thou shalt not mastermind revenge porn virality fast-tracked as assisted giving buybacked water
3. Thou shalt not unravel intermittent stressors micro-pandering algorithms chemtailing de-carbonized short-termism
4. Thou shalt keep holy capsized digital natives bombed out from branding assaulted pet-centric low earth orbits
5. Honor thy father and thy mother: Train & Wreck
6. Thou shalt not kill mood hungry electrocueticals retweeting pain capable e-commerce walls
7. Thou shalt not commit ice-capped infectivity trigger warning bingeing hackers’ redacting carried interest revenge porn
8. Thou shalt not steal graceful degradation borders terrorforming nuked yoyo dieted combinatorial explosions
9. Thou shalt not bear false witness against politicians bloviating metaprobabilities electrocuring corporate gene-edited shootings
10.Thou shalt not covet moral licensing of mutation detection climate-controlling browser beaten microbiome flybys.
Let it be known that the devils and sinners who deceive us shall be cast into the lake of fire and brimstone where the beasts and false profits are, and shall be tormented day and night for ever and ever. Amen.
Twelve Days of Stockpiling 2016 (Twelve Days of Christmas)
The Midnight Ride of Paul Revere
Listen my children and you shall hear,
Of the midnight ride of Paul Revere.
With a world-class city without no jive,
Hardly a man is now alive
Who remembers that famous betrayal and fear.
He said to his friend, “If the CEOs march
By land or sea with their 2.0 tonight,
Hang a torch aloft in the belfry arch
Of the Widett tower as a signal light-
One if by land, and two if by sea;
And I on the transparent shore will be,
Ready to ride and spread the alarm
The Olympics are coming! The Olympics are coming!”
* * * * * * * * * *
‘Twas the Night Before Christmas
‘Twas the night before the Olympics, when all through the house
Not a voter was stirring, not even a louse;
The medals were hung by the chimney with care,
In hopes that St. Olympics soon would be there;
The homeless were nestled all snug in their shreds,
While visions of glory danced in their heads;
And mamma in her moo moo, belting a rap,
Could not settle down without a night cap;
When out on the lawn there arose such a clatter,
I sprang from my bed to see fatcats untattered.
Away to the window, hoping for cash,
Tore down the plastic, I looked for the stash.
The moon on the breast of men in the know,
Gave a lustful promise to the riff-raff below.
When what to my wondering eyes did appear,
But a gigantic sleigh and eight whiny Bain-deer.
With a little manic fever so lively and schtick,
I knew in a moment, that dude’s not a chick.
More rapid than eagles his backers they came,
And he whistled, and shouted, and called them by name:
“Now Davey! Now Connor! Pugliuca and Fish! On Robey! Lucchino!
On Walsh and Patrick!
To the top of the Hill! To the top of the haul!
Now cash away! cash away! cash away all!”
His eyes—how they twinkled! With Putnam Investments,
His cheeks were like roses – Parthenon testaments!
His Fidelity pout was drawn up like a bow,
While the Celtics and Patriots put on a show!
MassMutual’s pipeline he held tight in his teeth,
And EMC smoke encircled above like a wreath;
He had a Staples’ face and Bank America belly,
That shook when he laughed, like State Street jelly.
He was chubby and Mutual, a Liberty old elf,
And I dared not laugh in spite of myself.
He sprang to his sleigh, to his team gave a whistle,
And away they all flew, shooting a pistol.
But I heard him exclaim, ere he drove out of sight--
“Happy Olympics to all, and to all a good plight!”
Mobil Warming: In God We Trust – U.N. Climate Change Conference 2015 in Paris. Conférence des Nations unies sur les changements climatiques à Paris en 2015.
Commander in Chief 2016
“Joseph built the pyramids to store grain. Now all the archaeologists think that they were made for the pharaohs’ graves.”
– Dr. Ben Carson, GOP Presidential Candidate
Link to Presidential candidate Donald Trump
Fireflies in the Night: The Great American Wigwam Burner
Eugene International Film Festival, Eugene, Oregon
Saturday, November 14, 5:00 pm
Bijou Metro Theater, 43 W. Broadway, Eugene, OR
This film features the historic & iconic symbol of the logging industry, the wigwam burner; Provincetown, MA, artist Jay Critchley, a former Oregon VISTA Volunteer from the 1970s, returns to direct this surprising documentary.